Stressed to the Max

… I wasn’t worried until I got the phone call

I always feel that no news is good news. It had been two weeks since my surgery; I was feeling good; the doctor who did the surgery hadn’t call me.

Then on Tuesday night when I got home from work there was a message on the phone to call my family doctor. It could only be one of two things; something showed up in the pathology report after the surgery or something showed up after my mammogram.

The next day from my office at school I called the clinic to find out why I had to see the doctor. The problem, however, is that you don’t get to talk to the doctor or even a nurse for that matter when you call the number they give you. All appointments are routed through a main switchboard and you speak to a phone receptionist who is nowhere near the actual clinic.

I know that you shouldn’t “shoot the messenger” but it was so frustrating trying to get any information from the receptionist. I knew she didn’t have access to my files and all she could tell me was that the visit had something to do with reviewing the results of the surgery.

The next problem was setting up an appointment that didn’t require me taking off an entire day or even part of a day to see the doctor. As I’ve probably told you before I’ve lost all my accumulated sick days because of a provincial government bill and I’ve already used up 3 of my 10 days for the year. The other complication is that my so called family doctor has moved further away to an area that is a little sketchy and the clinic he did work from has shut down.

My frustration on the phone was obvious and the receptionist, to her credit, was trying to help me find a solution. Apparently it doesn’t matter which clinic you visit your records can be accessed by any of their doctors. After being close to tears, we finally figured out that there is a clinic much closer to home and that I was able to get an appointment on Friday after work.

When I hung up the phone I turned around to find a small group of my library helpers standing at my door looking a little concerned. They told me I sounded a little stressed. What an understatement. I smiled and assured them that I was fine and gave each of them a job to do.

On Friday I left school early (4:15 instead of 6:00) and drove to my appointment. My friend, L, made me promise to call her as soon as I found out what the problem was. I thought I had left myself plenty of time to make it to my appointment but I ran into some unexpected traffic and I arrived 15 minutes late. It didn’t seem to matter though because the doctor was running late as well.

I had made reservations to meet friends for dinner that night for 7:00 and when I still hadn’t gotten in to see the doctor by 6:00 I started to fret about being late. I tried to call my husband but my phone had died so I hooked it up to the doctor’s outlet while I waited. As soon as I had enough juice to make calls I started calling my husband but he wasn’t picking up anywhere. Another thing to worry about.

When the nurse came into the room to see me she asked me why I was there. I explained the phone message I had received and she looked through her records. She then asked me if the appointment was for the breast screening results. There had been no mention of that before, so now I started to worry that maybe something had shown up on the mammogram. She repeated the same question and when I told her that I didn’t think so she told me that the doctor would be in to see me after one more patient.

I think that the next 15 minutes were the longest 15 minutes of my life. It’s funny how you think the worst and how many bad scenarios take hold of your mind. What will I tell my friends at dinner that night? Will I have to take more time off of work or will I just retire early?

Finally when my ‘new’ doctor arrived he put me at ease immediately. He went through all my charts, the letters from my surgeon and the breast screening results and couldn’t find any reason for me being there. The surgery went well, the mammogram was clear and I appeared to be very healthy. He double checked everything and couldn’t figure out why my last doctor underlined and question marked some of the details of the surgery. He asked me if there was anything else he could do for me while I was there so I had him give me my flu shots.

When I finally left the office I had 10 minutes to get to the restaurant. There was no time to go home first so I called my husband for the 3rd time, still didn’t get through to him so I left another message and told him to meet me at the restaurant. When I got there our friends were already waiting and the restaurant owner offered to called K again. Still no answer. A new worry! Eventually we did connect with my husband and he finally joined us at the restaurant but that’s another story for another time.

At least I was able to enjoy the rest of the evening and I didn’t have to tell people that I had a new health issue. I’m not sure I could have stayed quiet if there had been a problem. Unfortunately I forgot to phone my friend L back and I caused her some stress for a good chunk of her evening. She did eventually reach me at the restaurant and she figured out that everything was okay.

So what did I learn? …..that no news is good news!

sunning squirrel

I wish I could have been as relaxed as this little guy was while sunning himself outside my kitchen window this morning.

More Art and DIY Arm Warmers

…..going around in circles

The projects that I call “Going Around In Circles” are finally coming together and I’m starting to display them in the hall. These were done by my grade 3 class.

going around in circlesgoing around in circlesgoing around in circles

Lately I’ve had the urge to sew something useful and work with felted wool. I follow a blog called The Renegade Seamstress, created by Beth Huntington, and Beth recently posted a tutorial on how to make these great hand warmers.The Renegade Seamstress

If you’re interested in knowing how to make these great fingerless hand warmers check out her site. You might also be interested in making the felted clutch bag. Felted Clutch

Felted Clutch

Felted Clutch

Arm warmersI gave these hand warmers to my principal and friend who celebrated a special birthday today. She is always cold and she loved them. Happy Birthday, M!

Update on my Weight and Fitness Level

….I’m feeling good about my current status

It’s been awhile since I’ve written about my weight loss journey. It’s been 7 months since I started on this journey. In the beginning the weight came off quickly and the visible results were amazing. I reached my first goal of 30 pounds after 4 months.

The Benefits of Losing Weight

I felt great. I liked how I looked. It was wonderful buying new clothes and wearing size 16 pants for the first time in over 20 years. My blood pressure is back to normal levels and I’m able to run without feeling pain or gasping for air. I used to hate running and now I look forward to doing more and improving my time and overall distance.

My Love Affair With Food

I still enjoy food and eating but now I eat to nourish my body and I don’t constantly think about my next meal. I no longer feel deprived or crave sweets and junk food. On special occasions I’ll allow myself a very small serving of dessert or I might have a bite of something just to taste. It seems to satisfy me. I might enjoy a glass of wine once a week. Before the journey I’d regularly drink 2 glasses 3 or 4 times a week.

How Stress Affects Me

When I started back to work in September I was really worried about gaining some of my weight back. Years ago a naturopathic doctor assessed that I was very much affected by stress in my life. I could gain 2 to 5 pounds over a weekend when I was confronted with a stressful situation or if I anticipated a stressful occurrence. For years I would take weight off in the summer (no stress) and when I went back to work in September the weight would come back in the first two weeks.

This year I worked hard not to gain weight when I went back to work. Not gaining weight was as big a success as actually losing weight. It’s been an extremely stressful start this year. With the negative political climate for teachers in Ontario, weeding the library, running a book fair for the first time, organizing art on a cart and living through a district review and having surgery, it really is quite an accomplishment that I didn’t gain some of the weight back.

Despite everything I still managed to lose some more weight. It’s been a slow process compared to the beginning of the journey but I’m not discouraged. That’s another change that I’ve experienced. I don’t turn to food when things go wrong or don’t go exactly as planned. If I fall off the wagon I don’t wait till Monday to start eating properly again. I fix the problem with the very next meal.

Becoming Vegetarian 80% of the Time

I enjoy eating healthy foods. In the last two weeks I’ve eaten mostly vegan meals. If someone had told me in April that I would almost be a vegetarian I would have scoffed at the idea. I’ve always needed my animal protein but my husband has been experimenting with more and more vegan meals. I think eating this way has actually kick started my weight loss again.

Joining a Gym

I joined a gym this month and started working out this weekend. On Saturday and Sunday I started the day with our traditional walk through the college grounds with Frances and then in the afternoon I went to the gym and ran/walked on the treadmill for 20 minutes and then the elliptical machine for another 10 minutes. Next weekend I’m going for a fitness assessment and the trainer will design a program for me. I’m looking forward to this new part of my fitness journey.

How Much Weight Have I Lost?

While at the gym I weighed myself and according to their scales I’m down another 2 pounds for a total of 36 pounds. I’m 4 pounds away from losing 40 pounds in total. I’m very excited about how close I am. There are going to be challenges this week. I’m definitely going back to the gym tomorrow and I have yoga on Wednesday. For the rest of the week I have a number of social commitments but I’m pretty confident that I can handle it.

Reaching My Next Goal

I’m hoping that I can reach my 40 pound goal by the end of the month and then set the next of goal of 50 pounds in total. I say next because I know that the journey will continue. I don’t know for how long. I’m taking it one step at a time. I’m hoping that at some point in this journey I’ll be able to share my actual weight. I’m still not ready to do that but I have a number in mind and I’m getting close. Life is good!

Cheers

Peace Banners

…. created by students at my school for Remembrance Day

peace bannerpeace bannerspeace banner

peace banner

This is the first year I’ve missed the Remembrance Day assembly at school. I was off recovering from my surgery. Before I left I was able to collect most of the banners and a group of us picked some of the best from different grades within the school. We asked 5 students to talk about their banners at the assembly.

I took photos of the banners that were chosen and of the ones we were considering. One of my colleagues, K, agreed to create a slide show that would play while the students and our guests came into the gym. I also requested that someone take pictures of the gym after it was decorated with the banners. I think the children did a great job. Enjoy!

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The Next Best Thing to Children’s Art

….. buying children’s art books

Today I was able to leave school early and go the book vendors’ sale for teacher librarians. When I got there I only had two hours to browse and buy books. I had 2 main objectives: purchase this year’s Forest of Reading books and purchase French books.

Luckily one vendor had most of the Forest of Reading books so that I didn’t have to wander over that large room looking for the various titles. As for the French books, there was one vendor that sold only French books. The first time I went to this book sale this same vendor had already packed up and left by the time I got there. Even though I arrived 2 hours before closing, he was starting to pack up when I arrived at his section.

When they saw that I was interested in buying numerous books from them they were very helpful and over $900.00 later they were glad that they hadn’t left early this time. Normally I take a French Immersion teacher with me to help make decisions about which French books to buy; however today I literally had to judge a book by its cover and trust the suggestions made by the vendor. Hopefully I’ve made some good choices.

I had time to visit a third vendor today. The two women who own this book shop in the east end of Toronto are very knowledgeable about their books and I really enjoy buying books from them because they are so passionate about their books. They sold me several art books for children and I’ve decided to share them with you.

The first books are a series of art books by Irene Luxbacher, titled 1 2 3 I Can Paint, 1 2 3 I Can Print, 1 2 3 I Can Collage, 1 2 3 I Can Builld and 1 2 3 I Can Draw. They are written for children but teachers new to teaching art would find these books very helpful. Most of the examples could be used for art lesson plans.

art booksEach book has a materials page so that you’ll know what you need to complete all the projects. Each activity has step by step instructions with clear techniques and inspirational projects that will leave children with a sense of accomplishment. At the back of the book art words that are used throughout the book are explained and teachers and parents are given tips to “ensure a good art experience every time” for their children.

materials pagecity scene

art wordsTomorrow I will share some more books with you.

Cheers!

In the Pumpkin Patch

…. children’s art always makes me smile

Today we had the dreaded District Review. I knew that we would probably fare well but I couldn’t help but worry about my 15 minute inspection. I stayed up late to make samples for today’s lesson. I got up early and printed some worksheets, left the house without eating breakfast and worked through my lunch hour to set up the classroom for the lesson.

The 15 minute visit was over in a blink of an eye. We had to pretend that the team wasn’t in the room. The teacher wasn’t spoken to but they did ask questions of a few students while they worked. It was a pretty unsatisfying experience.

At the end of the day the staff was asked to come down to the staffroom for a quick overview of what the teams observed throughout the day. The report was positive and down the road a more detailed report will make it’s way back to the school with suggestions on how to move forward. You could almost hear the sigh of relief that every teacher wanted to release as the superintendent gave her report.

When I went back to the library I started to go through all the artwork that my 110 students have produced in the last 2 months. Their beautiful pictures fill me with a sense of pride. I’ve posted a few of the pumpkin pictures that my grades 2 and 3 students completed.

Enjoy!

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Things to Celebrate

…. a birthday, a reunion and weight loss

Last weekend my oldest daughter, A, celebrated her 33rd birthday. She invited us over for lunch. It was a small gathering; her father and I, her sister, G and her partner, J were in attendance. It was very intimate and the food was great. Unfortunately a few days later both A and J suffered from food poisoning and we’ve narrowed it down to the buttercream frosting on the birthday cake. Andrea's birthday

This morning when I weighed myself I lost the weight I had gained after my surgery. So I can now officially announce that I am down 34 pounds. Yahoo!

Today a group of my friends from high school had a mini reunion. One friend, LWC I hadn’t seen since 1978. We spent three hours over lunch reconnecting and catching up. What a great time. Old year books were passed around,  photos of our families were shared and funny stories were retold. We’ve already set a date in February to get together again.

Marcia, Liz and I

Laurie, Laurie and Lillian

The groupLife is good!

Cheers!!!!

 

Gaining Weight After Surgery?

…. sometimes I feel like my body enjoys tormenting me

I was very excited about my progress in the weight loss department. It seemed like I was finally moving in a positive direction again. The morning of my surgery I was down another 2 pounds for a total of 34 pounds. I actually thought I’d be down another pound or two after the surgery. Ha!

Wednesday morning I wasn’t allowed anything to eat or drink before being admitted to the hospital. The first food or drink that I had was about 5:00 that afternoon. I figured that I took in 800 calories for the whole day. Thursday morning I was up 2 pounds. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. I’m the only person I know that gains weight when prepping for a colonoscopy.

I took it easy on Thursday. I had oatmeal and berries for breakfast, 2 slices of pizza and salad for lunch and for dinner I made spaghetti squash and a vegetable stew. The next day I was up another 2 1/2 pounds.

On Friday I picked up my activity level and walked 5k and continued to eat sensibly. Still up 4 1/2 pounds this morning. Oh my! What would any sensible person do? Why shop of course. That’s what I do when I’m feeling somewhat down.

First I went and had my hair cut. Great start. Then I discovered that a new Marshall’s opened up around the corner from my hairdresser’s salon. There’s nothing like retail therapy when you’re down because of your weight. The good thing about it was that trying on clothes wasn’t a chore but was actually fun. Not buying clothes from the Plus section is a huge boost for my ego. I’m actually trying on dresses these days and like how I look in them.

When I got home tonight I finally took 3 garbage bags of my ‘fat’ clothes to the Goodwill. There’s no going back now. I can’t afford it.

I’m looking forward to getting back into a routine with my fitness journey. It looks like tomorrow will be a nice day. Frances, K and I will start the day with a nice long walk and later in the afternoon the huge piles of leaves on my front lawn will be bagged and put on the curb. Today K took a great picture of the fallen leaves on the trail where we walk Frances.

Fallen leaves

Most of the leaves are down.

Friday Drabble: Shameless

Hospital gowns aren’t a fashion statement and the wearers often find themselves feeling ill at ease knowing what lies underneath. Today hospitals supply you with two gowns so that your derriere isn’t flapping in the wind.

Sitting in the waiting room I couldn’t help but be drawn to the young man sitting across from me. It wasn’t his appearance or what he said that caused me to stare.  Sporting the blue gown, he sat with his legs wide apart.

I was so tempted to say, “Oh for goodness sake, put your knees together. We don’t need to see your junk!”

drabble is a very short story of exactly 100 words. Feel free to join in and write your own drabbles on Fridays and tag them with “friday drabble” and on Twitter with the hashtag #fridaydrabble.

A Dusting and Cleaning

…. all is well

Today I went to the hospital to have “my procedure” done. People at work knew I was  having surgery but many didn’t know why and found it awkward and difficult to ask me if I was okay and why surgery was necessary.  In turn I felt uncomfortable sharing that information but I didn’t want people to think that I had a life threatening condition either.

I have no problem talking about the procedure but I don’t want to make people uncomfortable either. That being said, why do we ‘pussy foot’ around what we’re having done, especially if it involves the female reproductive system? Do we whisper about other conditions that we have? No!

Men always ask if “it’s a woman’s thing?” and if the answer is yes they walk away, not wanting to know the details. Not all “women’s things” are equally weighted when it comes to determining one’s health. A hysterectomy is much more serious than a benign cyst on the uterus and cancer of the cervix is a potentially fatal condition compared to a bout of vaginitis, that is uncomfortable and somewhat painful but not life threatening.

I have to admit that we, as women, have allowed this stigma of don’t ask, don’t tell to perpetuate. Somehow, our mothers have ingrained into our consciousness that our ‘private parts’ are not to be mentioned in public company. It’s almost like we should be ashamed of the ovaries that sustain the human population. How bizarre is that?

I’m as guilty as anyone. When people asked I politely told them that I was only having day surgery and there was nothing to worry about. I wouldn’t think twice about saying I’m having a tonsillectomy, appendectomy or having my gall bladder removed. Many people are even insistent on showing off their scars after a surgical procedure. I really don’t get that but to each his own.

I have contemplated long and hard if I should publish this post. I decided that I needed to put my family’s and friends’ concerns at ease. I also didn’t want my blogging family to worry about me. So here goes. Today I had a D&C or as my friend, J, says a ‘dusting and cleaning’. D & C stands for dilation and curettage where the cervix is widened and the lining of the uterus is removed. I also had a lesion removed. It’s been sent away for testing but I haven’t heard the results. Hopefully ‘no news is good news’. My doctor’s not worried.

That’s it. All is well. If I’ve made you uncomfortable, I apologize but we need to question why female reproductive medical conditions make us feel that way. Wishing you all good health.

Cheers!