Tag Archives: humour

Sitting With an Ice Cube Against My Jaw

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…..recovering from dental gum surgery

Technically I’m not suppose to be doing this. The instruction sheet following periodontal surgery specifically says “NO TEXTING, FACEBOOK, VIDEO GAMES, 1ST 24 HOURS. “USE THE ICE”.” I have to admit that it is difficult to type while balancing a baggy of ice on your jawline but I only have to keep the ice on for 5 minutes and then off for 5 minutes. It’s time to take a break from typing and continue Icing. Back in five.

I’m back. The whole procedure today went very smoothly. There is so much freezing that I didn’t even feel the needles go in. My doctor never stopped talking for a minute. He told me jokes, and riddles, and talked about the latest scandal with Rob Ford, Gwenyth Paltrow’s lastest break-up, his wish to go scuba diving in Mexico, going to the movies with his wife and in between giving instructions to his assistant and explaining in detail what he was doing to me. The entire procedure took just over an hour.

Riddle #1: Mary’s mother had 4 daughters. She named them April, May, June and ….. What was the 4th daughter’s name?

I’ve been icing my jaw again and this time I reread some of the instructions. Apparently I have to avoid talking for 24 hours. I wonder if that’s why my husband is taking his time getting back with my meds. Luckily I’m not in any pain yet but I do have to start taking the antibiotics soon. The only thing I can eat for the first 24 hours is broth or smooth soups (no bits of meat or vegetables) and I’m really starting to get hungry.

A few other DO NOTS are:

  • Do not rinse for 24 hours
  • Do not brush teeth for 3 days
  • Do not use straws for 7 days
  • Do not drink alcohol for 24 hours
  • Do not exercise for 5 to 7 days
  • Do not sleep with your head down

Some Do Nots that I like are:

  • Do not do any housework
  • Do not do any heavy lifting

and some Dos

  • stretch out on the couch
  • let your husband pamper you (I made that one up)

Well I think I’ll go and put my feet up and hopefully my husband will arrive shortly.

Answer to the riddle: The fourth daughter’s name is Mary.

Papers Fluttering in the Breeze, Paint Boxes Strewn Over the Pavement and Blocks of Foam Flying Like TumbleWeed

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…… the flaws of doing “art on a cart”

It seemed like a good idea at the time.

I do “art on a cart”. I don’t have my own classroom to hold my art classes. So I load up a cart with all the supplies that I need for each class.

Today was no exception except that the cart had to go outside and travel to the portable at the far end of the colas area. This isn’t the first time I’ve done this but for some reason I had one disaster after another today.

I had loaded the cart with bins filled with pots of tempera paint, paint boxes and brushes. It also held containers for holding water and cleaning brushes, a tray filled with hand made stamps glued to blocks of foam, paper for the next project and the unfinished projects from last week. I also carry a bin filled with markers, scissors and examples of art and books that I use for the lesson.

On top of that I also have to carry water to the class. As the bell rang one of my colleagues needed me to open the computer for the library so that her class could exchange books. She volunteered a few of her students to transport my art supplies to the portable while I set up the computer for her.

The students eagerly pushed the cart towards the outside doors. From the library I could hear the brushes fall to the floor. I wasn’t too worried, they were only brushes after all but when I got outside the students were only half way to the portable. The bin with the pots of tempera paint had fallen off the cart and the jars were rolling about on the pavement. I’m sure one of them broke because there was paint on the outside of one of the jars.

As we got closer to the portable the papers started to flutter in the wind and I grabbed them before they took off. The waiting class rushed into the classroom as soon as I opened the door and left me and the supplies outside. Normally they’re very helpful but today I had to go into the class and recruit help to bring all the supplies inside.

The next problem occurred when I tried to find surfaces in the classroom to put all the supplies. The table I had been using was filled with light experiments. So now I’m placing bins of supplies wherever I find a modicum of space.

Once the lesson started I was fine but I did have some difficulty finding things because my bins were spread out around the classroom. The worst part of the day was yet to happen.

As I was loading up the cart to bring things back into the school a huge gust of wind came up and my foam blocks literally flew out of the tray and immediately tumbled over the playground in all directions. My students quickly took up the challenge trying to retrieve them. I think I’ll be finding stray little blocks for days to come.

I carried the papers and the projects to keep them from suffering the same fate while a group of students pushed the cart. I was slightly ahead of the cart when I heard a crash. The bin with the paint boxes fell and they were strewn over the pavement. Again the kids scurried to pick them up but in their haste they weren’t properly stacked and when they resumed pushing the cart  the bin fell out once again.

When I finally got inside I was ready to pull out my hair. Some the staff couldn’t help but laugh when I described my afternoon. The OA immediately got out the catalogues looking for a new cart that had bins that are securely fastened to the cart. However that won’t help me tomorrow when I have to do this all over again in the other portable that I deliver art to.

What about the art you say? Well that’s what makes all this worthwhile. I’ll share some of the new work in tomorrow’s post.

Loading this up, keeping it stocked and pushing it back and forth from the library to the class I teach is a bit of a challenge, especially when I have to go to the portables and lug buckets of water with me.